


Bring Color to My Skies

by musictomydamagedears



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Shane/Sara and Ryan/Helen will happen i guess, Slow Burn, Soulmates, still at buzzfeed, this is going to be a long ride, will follow timeline-ish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-05-24
Packaged: 2019-05-02 18:02:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14550270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musictomydamagedears/pseuds/musictomydamagedears
Summary: In a world filled with color, most people were black and white from birth. The only way to see color permanently was to touch your soulmate. Of course, with a few exceptions.Ryan Bergara doesn't have a soulmate, and thinks the whole thing is bullshit. Shane Madej can't wait to meet his.





	1. The New Guy

In a world filled with color, most people were black and white from birth. The only way to see color permanently was to touch your soulmate. There were a few cases in the world where someone was seeing color from the start, but it was rare. There were also people on the opposite side of the specter. About 1:100 000 was born without a soulmate, and about 1:10 000 000 were born with a soulmate who didn’t reciprocate it. 

Every newborn was given a pair of glasses with special abilities, making them able to see color while they wore them. This was so that they could learn the colors from an early age. You had the choice of purchasing new pairs until you were 20 years old, when you would get free glasses that was supposed to fit for the rest of your life. Demented people who had forgotten that their partner had died, was usually given permanent lenses, as the suicidal rate used to be high amongst the people losing their colors.You see, the bond goes much deeper than just seeing colors. You can feel their emotions, and some believed that if the bond was strong enough, you could sometimes hear each other’s thoughts. 

At Buzzfeed, you had probably every combination of colored and uncolored people that you could imagine.

You had the try guys, who were all so different. Ned, who was happily married to his soulmate, both colored. You had Zach, uncolored and not ashamed of it. Eugene, unbonded, but didn’t wear glasses because he was ashamed. Then you had Keith, who was in a one-sided color bond. They were both each other’s soul mates, but Keith never got the colors, so he was stuck with his glasses.

You had people like Gaby, whose soulmate had broken the bond, but who didn’t really care.

You had people like Allison, who was the ultimate believer in soulmates, never dating anyone who wasn’t the right one. 

Then you had people like Ryan Bergara. Someone who thought soulmates were bullshit, didn’t have a soulmate, and didn’t want a soulmate. He was fine on his own, thank you very much. Who needed colors anyway? He had his glasses, and he didn’t need anyone to feel his emotions.

Besides, he was in a happy unbonded relationship with someone who lost their soulmate, and he didn’t want to leave her.

“Hey, looks like you have a new desk mate,” Keith greeted Ryan as he walked to his normal desk. He frowned, and sure enough, there was someone sitting in the seat next to his for the first time in a while.

“Hey,” he cleared his throat, sitting down in his seat. He looked at the man next to him, and he wasn’t entirely convinced that they would get along. The other man seemed a bit uptight. From what Ryan could observe, he was freakishly tall, he wore glasses – probably didn’t have a soulmate then, and he was awkward as fuck.

“Hi,” the other man greeted, waving awkwardly. “I’m, uh, I’m Shane.”

“Cool, I’m Ryan,” Ryan nodded at him, smiling a bit before turning towards his pc. He had some deadlines coming up, he couldn’t exactly socialize with the new guy.

“Hey, Shane,” Ned looked over at the new guy. “What is your stance on soulmates?”

“Oh, I think soulmates are lovely. Haven’t met mine yet, but I’m excited to see what all the fuzz is about!” Shane said, and Ryan rolled his eyes. Of course the new guy was a pro-soulmate kind of dude.

“Ryan here doesn’t really believe in soulmates. He thinks that your soul is just as complete without one,” Ned said, pointing towards the man in question. Ryan glared up at him before shaking his head slightly.

“I just don’t see the point,” he said. 

The more he learned about Shane, the more skeptic he got. Apparently the man loved soulmates, and believed in telepathy between strong bonds, but not in ghosts or any other supernatural shit. Telepathy was some supernatural shit! Two souls splitting before coming together again was some supernatural shit!

As the day slowly went by, Ryan decided to just ignore the man unless he addressed him directly. That’s how he went the entire rest of the work day without saying a word to one Shane Madej.

His mood somehow didn’t get better even when he got home. Shane’s stupid face and opinions wouldn’t leave his mind, and Ryan didn’t have time to think about the other man. Not even Helen managed to distract him, and Ryan was honestly a bit concerned about what the fuck this meant. 

When he arrived at work the next morning, it was a sleep deprived and annoyed Ryan who stepped into the office. Usually smiling and joking around with people, he knew that he was confusing most of his coworkers. The worst part was that he couldn’t even figure out why he was so annoyed, and why this Shane person was bothering him so much.

He continued like this for the next two weeks, still as annoyed, and still as bothered by his new desk mate. At the 16th day of having Shane as his new desk mate, Ryan was nearly falling asleep by the desk due to his lack of sleep during the night. He took of his glasses, yawned, rubbing his hands over his face.

Someone – due to the angle it was probably Shane – poked his shoulder, and Ryan opened his eyes. Startled by what he saw, he jumped backwards in his seat. Checking to see that he had indeed taken off his glasses, things suddenly made a lot more sense.

He was seeing colors, and Shane fucking Madej was his soulmate. What the actual fuck. 

Ready to see Shane freaking out equally as bad, he was surprised to see the other man calm next to him. Why wasn’t he freaking out? He was the one who wanted a soulmate, not Ryan. 

“Could you help me with something?” Shane asked, as if nothing had happened, and Ryan just gaped at him. Was he serious? No mention of the fact that they were apparently soulmates?

“Shane, Ryan,” Andrew, another intern, walked over to them, apparently not sensing that they were going through something. “They’re doing this experiment where non-colors are going to try identifying colors without their glasses, to see if some people are better at it than others, and why that might be. You in?”

“Sure!” Shane said, smiling. Ryan just looked at him. He wasn’t wearing his glasses either, so Shane should be totally aware that he was no longer non-colored. 

Unless he was.

Which meant that not only was Ryan bonded. He was bonded to someone he didn’t like. And his bond was unreciprocated. Fuck.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened last chapter: 
> 
> “Shane, Ryan,” Andrew, another intern, walked over to them, apparently not sensing that they were going through something. “They’re doing this experiment where non-colors are going to try identifying colors without their glasses, to see if some people are better at it than others, and why that might be. You in?”
> 
> “Sure!” Shane said, smiling. Ryan just looked at him. He wasn’t wearing his glasses either, so Shane should be totally aware that he was no longer non-colored. 
> 
> Unless he was.
> 
> Which meant that not only was Ryan bonded. He was bonded to someone he didn’t like. And his bond was unreciprocated. Fuck.

“Awesome. Ryan?” the blond man turned towards Ryan, who shook his head. Shane rolled his eyes at him, and Ryan bit his lip.

 

“I don’t really do videos about soulmates, I’ll pass,” he shook his head eventually, turning back towards his desk and the video he was editing. Andrew seemed to take his no for an answer, and shrugged. Ryan put on his headset, waiting for the two other men to walk away. 

 

Once he was pretty much alone, he quickly pulled up his phone to do a quick research on unreciprocated soulmates. Of course, the three first articles were all from BuzzFeed. What had he expected, an actual news source?

  
 

** Living With an Unreciprocated Bond – How Do We Do it?  **

****

** 10 Tips for Victims of Unreciprocated Bonds **

****

** 5 Tips for Those with Unreciprocated Bonds **

****

He eventually decided to check out the last one, as he didn’t seem to find anything else that would make sense for his situation.

 

_Living with an unreciprocated bond can be hard, but not if you follow this list of tips and things to do if your bond is unreciprocated!_

  1. _Don’t freak out_



_Even though your bond is unreciprocated doesn’t mean that your soulmate won’t like you!_

  1. _Touch them a lot_



_Touching is very important when you have a soulmate! This goes for the unreciprocated bonds too. It is the only thing the bond craves and wants from you. Maybe you could make an arrangement? Either lots of small touches throughout the whole day, or one serious session of cuddling per day should cover it!_

  1. _Break the bond_



_If number 4 is impossible for you, this might be the only solution. Having an unreciprocated bond without the closeness of an actual bonded couple might have fatal consequences. It may sound hard, but sometimes, you have to make hard decisions. Remember that your soulmate still has to consent to it, even though it isn’t reciprocated._

  1. _Remember that you’re not the only one affected!_



_In an unreciprocated bond, you are both affected by this. You might be perceived as the lucky one, by most, seeing as your soulmate will never get their colors! Talk to your soulmate about this, and take their feelings into consideration when you feel mad at the situation._

  1. _Tell Them!_



_This one may be obvious, but you have to tell your soulmate! If you don’t tell them, you are going to have a really hard time with all of those other tips we provided you with!_

“What a bullshit list,” Ryan muttered to himself. There was no fucking way that he was going to tell Shane about this. No way. Ever. What was he going to do, though? People would know that he was colored, he couldn’t exactly use his glasses, as they would dull down the colors majorly and give him headaches.

 

He exited out of the article, and then made another google search; ‘how to hide an unreciprocated bond’. He browsed through the links, eventually finding an article that seemed helpful.

 

_Hiding an Unreciprocated Bond – Is it Possible?_

_When I first found out that I was in an unreciprocated bond, I was terrified. After googling a lot, all the options I had seemed unlikely, and I decided to find out if I could hide it. Here is what I learned._

_Hiding an unreciprocated bond is indeed possible, but I don’t recommend it. If you manage to hide it the first two months, you’ll be able to hide it forever, but chances are that your soulmate will figure it out before that. And they won’t be happy about it. I lasted about 1 and a half month, right before my bond was starting to become whole, until I broke and told my soulmate. They were furious, and they avoided me, which landed me a trip to the ER due to the lack of touching._

_However, if you still want to hide your bond, here is how I did it:_

  1. _Find stupid excuses to keep touching them all the time. You – literally – won’t be able to survive without touching them. If you’re friends, that might be easy for you. If you’re not friends, befriend them, because that will make it a whole lot easier. High fives, leaning slightly into them, having your knees or shoulders touch, brushing against them every now and then._  

  2. _Get yourself a pair of colorless glasses, because the fact that you’re not wearing glasses is a big giveaway. Alternatively, get yourself an empty box of color lenses, and just tell people who are wondering that you’re wearing them. I found that colorless glasses was the best option though._  

  3. _AVOID THE SOULMATE TOPIC AT ALL COSTS! You WILL slip up. At first I tried bringing it up at every chance I got, but that came around to bite me in the ass as I almost managed to tell them that I was colored._  

  4. _What are their stance on soulmates? Do they love them? Hate them? Neutral? My soulmate hated them, which is one of the reasons I decided to hide it from them. I feel pretty neutral about the whole thing, but if you have strong feelings about them, you might have a harder / easier time than I did with this. Remember that if your soulmate is pro-soulmates, they won’t ever get their soulmate, and you are the only one who knows this. That might be hard on you._  

  5. _Don’t flirt with them. This will lead to an awkward situation later, if you start dating._  

  6. _(If befriending them) Don’t rush into the friendship and make it obvious, but remember that you only have one week from discovering the bond until you have to touch them quite frequently. The first week you can get away with little to no touching, but after the 7_ th day, your bond is starting to develop, and you might faint if you don’t touch.  

  7. _Don’t tell anyone. Humans are terrible at keeping secrets, someone will tell them. However, I recommend getting a therapist.  
  
_
  8. _The easiest thing to do for you both really is to tell them. That way you can either break the bond or give it a shot, making it a whole lot less dangerous, but who am I to tell you what to do._



_As I said, I don’t recommend doing this, but if you do, I wish you good luck, and please, please be careful. Your life is more important than hiding a bond, if this gets dangerous on you, you have to tell them, and don’t be ashamed to call an ambulance if you need to._

As he finished reading the article, Ryan had made up his mind. He was going to hide his bond, and he would have to start right now. Glasses, he needed colorless glasses. He checked the time, deciding to head out to get a pair right away.

 

When he returned to the office forty minutes later, with both the colorless glasses, but also a box of colorless lenses, disguised as color lenses (who knew they even sold that?), Shane was back.

 

“Hey man,” he smiled slightly at him as he sat down, knowing that he would have to befriend him. “How did you do?”

 

“Huh?” Shane turned around to face him, looking both confused and surprised at the fact that Ryan actually spoke to him.

 

“The video, they were checking how well you could recognize colors, right? How did you do?” Ryan repeated, Shane just looked at him, almost a bit suspiciously. The younger waited for him to reply, still somewhat smiling. Eventually, Shane seemed to realize that Ryan just wanted to make conversation, and answered him.

 

“I actually did quite well!” Shane let himself return the smile. “I was up against Eugene, though.”

 

“And he lost, of course,” Eugene said, smirking over at them. Shane rolled his eyes, and Ryan laughed a bit.

 

“Of course he did! You’re good at like, everything, and you don’t ever wear your glasses!” Zach exclaimed. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were bonded.”

 

“He got every single one correct, I’m convinced that he cheated,” Shane scoffed, making Ryan frown a bit. Maybe Eugene was in the same situation as him? Who knew.

 

“Well, you only had two misses,” Eugene said. “I wonder how you did compared to the others. Because, I do feel that pro-bonds would be better than no-bonds.”

 

“You’re pro-bond, then?” Ryan asked him, genuinely curious. Eugene never really talked about soulmates, even though the rest of try guys loved bringing it up whenever they could.

 

“Yeah,” Eugene shrugged. “I would love to have a soulmate.”

 

“Me too,” Shane said with a sigh, smiling to himself. Ryan bit the inside of his cheek. Should he feel guilty about this? Probably, yes.

 

“Why?” Ryan blurted, unable to keep silent. “What would you do if your bond was unreciprocated? Or if your soulmate doesn’t want you and wants to break the bond? Wouldn’t it be much better to stay unbonded?”

 

“Statistically, that is very unlikely to happen,” Shane looked at him, shrugging. “It’s like, what, 1 in every 10 million who has an unreciprocated bond? It would suck, yes, but I would hate being the one doomed to a life without colors.”

 

“Whatever,” Ryan muttered, noticing a pull in his chest. It was the bond, he realized, and he scowled at the other man. Shane looked a bit taken aback, but shrugged as he turned back to his own screen. Figuring that maybe he should put in somewhat of an effort, Ryan huffed and poked his shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry for seeming so pissed, all the time,” he told him. “Want to grab a beer tonight?”

 

“Uh, sure?” Shane looked a bit skeptical, and Ryan was just happy that he agreed. For some reason, he found himself wanting to spend time with the other man. Not that he ever wanted him to find out about their one-sided bond, though.

 

They agreed on a time and a place, and then they both went back to work.

 

After a while, Ryan sighed, remembering that when Shane had touched him – when he got his colors – the other man had wanted his help with something. He put his hand on Shane’s shoulder, just to touch him again. “Hey, dude, you still need help with that thing?”

 

“What? Oh, uhm, yes,” Shane took his headset off and started explaining to Ryan what he needed help with. Fortunately, it was something Ryan actually knew how to do, so he was able to help him. Being close to Shane made Ryan happier, for some reason, and it kind of annoyed him.

 

“Thanks man,” Shane smiled, as Ryan finished helping him. The younger of the two smiled faintly.

 

“No problem, just ask me if there’s anything else, yeah?” Ryan smiled at him, resisting the slight urge he had to touch him again. Receiving a nod in reply, he turned back to his computer.

 

The workday wasn’t that much different from the rest of his workdays, except for the fact that he constantly found himself subconsciously moving towards Shane. He didn’t think that the taller man had noticed yet, but he didn’t want to risk accidentally touching him. This whole thing bothered him quite a bit, and the fact that his body acted without consent from his brain was slightly unsettling.

 

After work, Ryan barely had time to eat dinner and change clothes before he was supposed to meet with Shane at the bar. He was feeling slightly nervous about it, and he really had no idea why. He met up with his colleagues for beer all the time, Shane really wasn’t any different, was he? Like except for the fact that he was his fucking soulmate.

 

“Hey!” Shane greeted him, as he walked over to where he sat in the bar. Ryan was 10 minutes late, but Shane didn’t seem to mind too much. As Shane pushed a beer towards him with a grin, Ryan felt the bond in his chest tighten just slightly, and he blushed just a little bit. Due to the lighting of the pub, he was pretty sure Shane couldn’t tell, though.

 

“I hope you haven’t been here long?” the shorter man asked, and Shane shook his head, telling him that he arrived about three minutes ago. Ryan nodded and took a sip of his beer, pleasantly surprised as he noticed that it was his favorite beer.

 

“You like it?” Shane asked, looking a bit insecure and unsure of himself, nodding towards the beer in Ryan’s hand. Ryan grinned and nodded.

 

“Yeah! It’s my favorite, actually!” he told him.

 

“Oh, mine too!” Shane smiled, but Ryan could still tell that he was feeling a bit insecure. The other man frowned down into his drink before looking at Ryan again. “Look, thanks for inviting me here, but I know, okay?”

 

Ryan thought he was going to faint. Shane knew?


	3. Chapter 3

“Uhm,” Ryan chuckled nervously. “Know what?”

“I know you don’t like me. It wasn’t very hard to notice. I promise I’m a decent guy though, and I appreciate you trying,” Shane smiled at him, and Ryan had to hold back a relieved sigh. He didn’t know. Thank god that he didn’t fucking know.

“Sorry, but yeah, I really didn’t like you,” Ryan grimaced, chuckling a bit. “Imagine coming into the office, seeing a fucking giant in the chair next to yours, and then to top it off, you don’t have anything in common.”

“Come on, we have to have at least something in common,” the taller man said with a twinkle in his eyes, and Ryan shrugged. Well, did they? Could you bond with someone you had absolutely nothing in common with?

“Okay. Star Wars or Harry Potter?” Ryan asked. “3, 2, 1.”

“Star Wars,” Shane said, at the same time as Ryan said “Harry Potter.” The two men sighed, and Ryan motioned for Shane to ask one.

Half an hour, multiple beers, and several silly questions later, they discovered that they did indeed have some stuff in common. They both preferred The Lion King to Aladdin, they both preferred Tangled to Frozen, they both loved popcorn, and they would rather stay in and watch a movie and drink some beer at home with their friends than go to a big party. They also both preferred boxer briefs.

“So, why are you so against soulmates?” Shane asked Ryan, who had subconsciously moved closer to the older man the entire night. They weren’t close enough to touch each other or anything, but the space between them had lessened considerably. Ryan sighed at the question. It wasn’t something he really spoke about.

“Long story short, my parents broke their bond, and my friend is dead,” Ryan deadpanned, glaring slightly at him. Shane flinched, and the shorter of the two let out a small huff and a sigh. “I’m sorry dude, I don’t really talk too much about it.”

“No, it’s fine, I’m sorry for asking, I didn’t realize it would be such a personal question,” Shane looked at him, almost as if curious about Ryan’s train of thoughts.

“Of course not, because soulmates are just so great, aren’t they?” Ryan spat, a bit harsher than he had intended. It didn’t seem to affect the other man too much, as Shane took another drink of his beer.

“Don’t you want to meet yours?” he asked him curiously. No, Ryan had indeed not wanted to meet his soulmate.

“I have a girlfriend who loves me, and who I love back,” the words felt a bit foreign in his mouth, as if he wasn’t supposed to say them. By the way his bond responded, tightening painfully, he was pretty sure that he wasn’t.

“Yeah, but your soulmate is perfect for you! Can’t you just imagine having someone you want to spend all of your time with, someone who always can tell if something is up without even talking to you, someone that will make your mood improve simply by their touch?”

As Shane spoke, Ryan wanted nothing more than to just touch him, to make his bond loosen up and not feel as suffocating, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t do that to himself.

“No,” Ryan shook his head, and he was honestly telling the truth. Would he had liked to have that with Helen? Yes, kind of. Would he want to have that with Shane? Not at all.

“I just don’t get it. Finding a soulmate is apparently like filling a hole in your chest that you didn’t even know was there until you find them. It’s adorable! How can you not want that?”

“Shane, I’m trying hard to like you, but right now you’re making it difficult, man,” Ryan buried his head in his hands. When he looked up again, he just couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

“You said you’re open to dating someone that isn’t your soulmate. Say that you find the woman – or man, if you swing that way – of your dreams. Then, after being completely sure that you want to spend the rest of your life with them, you suddenly meet your soulmate. What would you do? Or what if the bond is unreciprocated? You could risk either losing your soulmate and colors, or you know, fucking dying!”

“Man, you okay?” Shane asked eventually, after Ryan seemed to have calmed down just a bit.

“Yeah, I told you, I don’t talk about this too often,” Ryan sighed. “It’s for a reason.”

“Okay, more importantly then,” Shane locked eyes with him. “How can you believe that ghosts are real?”

Ryan tried to stay mad at him, but eventually gave in to the laughter bubbling up in his throat. “Man! Ghosts are real! I even have footage of some scary shit that happened to me, like, 5 years ago!”

“I don’t believe it,” Shane shook his head. “Ghosts can’t be scientifically explained.”

“Neither can soulmates,” Ryan pointed out. “They’ve tried for how many years, and all we know is that we all have a soul structure to match someone else’s.”

“But I know that soulmates are real, because I’ve seen it happen, and I-“

“And I’ve seen the works of a ghost, dude! Ghosts are real!”

The discussion didn’t really come to an end, but after they had discussed the matter for nearly two hours, Ryan’s foot barely touching Shane’s just to relieve the strain on his bond, they realized that they had to leave at some point. Ryan would have denied it if you asked, but he actually didn’t want to leave Shane. He knew that it was probably his bond talking, and not his brain, but he wanted the fucking giant of a man to spend just a little more time with him.

“Like, except for the fact that you’re obviously a moron, this wasn’t too bad,” Ryan laughed, smiling at Shane as they stood outside the bar. Shane smiled back at him, letting out a chuckle. The shorter of the two moved just slightly, just so that his shoulder was touching Shane’s upper arm.

He figured that he should try and touch Shane as much as possible before going to bed, as sleeping with a strained bond was supposedly impossible. If Shane even noticed the fact that they were now touching, he didn’t mention it.

“Maybe we should do this again sometime?” Shane asked, and Ryan nodded. Who knew that he would actually have a good time? He had been prepared to pretend like having a good time, simply to make hiding his bond easier, but now he actually wanted to be Shane’s friend. Not just pretending to be.

“Definitely. Maybe a movie night or something? Seeing as we both apparently prefer staying in than going out,” Ryan suggested, ignoring the fact that he was just as nervous as he had been when he asked his girlfriend out for the first time.

“Only if there’s popcorn and beer involved,” Shane fucking winked, and Ryan thought he was going to sink into the ground. Why did that make him so flustered? Why did Shane even wink at all?

“Want my number?” Ryan blurted, feeling very much like his teenage self going on a first date with some silly crush. However, he wasn’t a teenager anymore, this wasn’t a date, and this was his soulmate. “Just, so, you know, it’s easier to schedule.”

“Sure!” Shane handed Ryan his phone, and Ryan quickly entered his phone number. Not even five seconds later, his phone buzzed. He fished it up to see a text from an unknown number, looking over at Shane as he saw the text.

From: Unknown Number  
Hi, from your favorite giant. P.S. Ghosts aren’t real.

“Really, man?” Ryan looked up at Shane, who was struggling to withhold a laugh. “Fucking moron. I don’t like you anymore.”

“Anymore? So you did like me at one point?” Shane grinned, and Ryan just shook his head and flipped him off before saving his number.

To: Annoying Co-Worker (Fucking Giant)  
You’re not my favorite giant. BFG is my favorite.

From: Annoying Co-Worker (Fucking Giant)  
What the fuck is BFG?

To: Annoying Co-Worker (Fucking Giant)  
Big Friendly Giant? By Roald Dahl? No? Loser.

“Why are we texting each other?” Shane eventually spoke. “You’re right here.”

“Because I’m leaving,” Ryan smirked at him, then turned around. As he walked towards his apartment, he shouted: “Goodbye, sasquatch!”

“See you at work!” he heard Shane shout back at him, and Ryan rolled his eyes. Why did he find this stupid man so charming? He wasn’t supposed to find him charming. He was supposed to find him intolerable and annoying!

As he walked home, Ryan had no idea how to feel about this night. He had managed to befriend Shane, which had been his goal, but he hadn’t planned on actually being his friend. How would this affect his ability to hide it? Shane didn’t seem like the touchy-feely type either, so touching him would be a problem either way. Fuck. Was he actually falling for his soulmate in less than 20 hours?

When he got inside, he noticed that Shane had texted him while walking back to his place, and Ryan couldn’t fight the smile on his face as he texted him back.

From: Annoying Co-Worker (Fucking Giant)  
Goodnight, Ryan. Sleep tight, and don’t let the demons bite. I hope you get haunted tonight.

To: Annoying Co-Worker (Fucking Giant)  
I hate you.

From: Annoying Co-Worker (Fucking Giant)  
Obviously.

“Hey, did you have a good time?” Helen greeted Ryan with a kiss as he stepped into their living room. He smiled and told her briefly about their night, obviously leaving out the details about how he was his soulmate and Ryan was kind of questioning his entire existence.

“All in all, it was a good night, but I’m exhausted,” he admitted. “I just want to go bed. Want to come?”

“Sure, give me ten minutes, yeah? I’m watching this show, and I just want to finish the episode,” she smiled and pecked his lips, and he smiled back at her before going into the bathroom to get ready for the night. The very first thing he did was to throw cold water in his face. He felt terrible, all the good feelings he had had while walking home had disappeared the second his lips touched his girlfriend’s.

“Fucking bond, ruining my love life,” he growled, suddenly despising soulmates more than he ever had. The only thing that could ever make this worse was if Shane found out about it.

As they exchanged their usual ‘I love you’s before going to bed, Ryan was doubting his words for the first time ever. He did love her, he knew that, she was perfect for him. However, she wasn’t who he was meant to be with, and his bond made sure that he was perfectly aware of that. And he hadn’t even been bonded for a day. How the fuck was he supposed to last two months.

The rest of the first week of hiding his bond went relatively okay. He didn’t have to touch Shane all of the time just yet, and they texted each other regularly, mostly sharing memes or offending each other.

Helen had noticed a change in him, he knew she had, because she was constantly asking him if he still loved her or if she looked good. She looked good, and he did love her, he just needed to develop this bond first, then they could go back to normal.

The second week, however, proved to be more difficult. He had noticed the change almost immediately. Ryan did no longer want to touch Shane Madej, he needed to. It was unbearable to see Shane touch anyone else, and Ryan became possessive. He figured that it was instinctual, because he didn’t really care whether Shane touched other people, but his bond certainly did.

It wasn’t until the ninth day he did his first fuck-up, though. He had miscalculated how strong his bond was and how long he could go without Shane’s touch, and he had said yes to doing a video that would take several hours. Ryan himself wasn’t the first to notice that anything was wrong, though.

“Dude,” Zack, another intern who was filming, looked over at him, turning off the camera. “You okay?”

“Yeah, why?”

“You look really pale. You’re not feeling dizzy or sick or anything, are you?”

Now when Zack mentioned it, Ryan did indeed not feel that well. It felt as if someone was stabbing him in the chest, he was nauseous, and he had a horrible headache. And, was he sweating? Sweating. Nausea. Headache. Chest pains. Why did those symptoms seem so familiar?

Oh, fuck. He was experiencing Acute Bond Deterioration. He had spent too much time away from Shane. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. This was bad.

“Get Shane Madej,” Ryan stared up at Zack. “Now. Tell him that I wanted him to do this with me, or whatever, just get him as fast as you can. He has no choice.”

“What if he says no?” Zack hesitated. “I can’t force anyone.”

“Then I might die, can you please fucking hurry up?” Ryan snapped, and Zack suddenly seemed to understand what was happening, because he asked “Does he know?”, receiving a shake of the head from Ryan, before literally running out of there as fast as he could.

He returned shortly after with what was a very confused Shane Madej. Ryan had never been as relieved to see anyone in his entire life. Zack told Shane to sit next to Ryan, as close as he could, thanks, and that they were going to play a game. Ryan looked over at Zack in confusion, as that was not the video, but when Shane’s knee touched his own and everything just got a little bit better, he understood what he was doing. He was helping him.

“Okay, so, the rules of the game are pretty simple,” Zack said. “You have to hold hands at all time, you have to look each other in the eyes, and then you are going to insult the person in front of you. You’re not allowed to laugh, if you do that, you lose, and there will be a forfeit.”

It was decidedly the most silly game Ryan had ever heard of, but he was impressed that Zack had managed to come up with it just like that, just to give Ryan an excuse for touching him. They turned their chairs to face each other, then grabbed each other’s hands. Shane was the one to start, and Ryan put his mind to ‘insult mode’.

“Your face is stupid.”

“I don’t think you’re one to speak about stupid faces, you’re not exactly a pretty sight.”

“I imagine that when your girlfriend wakes up next to you in the mornings, her first thoughts are ‘why is there a troll in my- oh wait, no, that’s just Ryan.”

“I’m sure the only reason why you haven’t had any experience with ghosts is because they figured that you’re already dead.”

“Wait, why would I be dead?” Shane asked, confused, and Ryan started laughing, not even caring that he had lost. He felt a lot better anyway, so it was fine to stop the game. Shane let out a cheer for his victory, and Zack grinned mischievously at them. Ryan really didn’t like that look, and he closed his eyes, preparing for the worst.

“So, Ryan,” Zack smiled. “Since you lost. You have to look Shane in the eyes and give him 3 compliments. No laughing. If you laugh, you have to do 3 more. That will continue until you manage to compliment him three times in a row without laughing. Oh, and no sarcastic compliments either.”

“Fine,” Ryan sighed. “It will be hard finding any compliments for such a big-headed moron, though.”

“Shut up,” Shane scoffed, smiling and widening his eyes comically for Ryan to look into. Ryan rolled his eyes.

“Shane, I’m happy you ended up sitting next to me,” Ryan said, surprising himself with how genuine he was. Shane nodded with a small smile, and Ryan continued. “You have good taste in snacks. Also, you make me laugh a lot.”

The whole moment turned out to be a lot more intimate than either man had suspected, but Zack however seemed pretty satisfied. He eventually sent Shane back, leaving Ryan there on his own.

“I would say that you owe me, as I now have to actually make this into an actual video, but I don’t want you to worry. However, if you ever need to talk to somebody who has been in your situation, just, uhm, text me or something, yeah?” Zack looked at Ryan, who stared at him. That was why Zack had been so helpful,

“Who?” Ryan blurted, he curiosity taking over.

“Justin,” Zack shrugged with a sad smile. “Oh, and Ryan? It does get better once the bond is developed. I’m still with my girlfriend, it’s just going to be very hard these two months.”

“Uh, wow, thanks for telling me, I guess?” he wasn’t entirely sure how he was supposed to react to this, but he supposed that this was a fine reaction. “It’s nice to know that it’s doable.”

“Yeah, it seems impossible, doesn’t it?” Zack chuckled. “But fuck off back to your desk, I have a whole new video to plan.”

Ryan laughed and walked back to his desk, sitting down next to Shane. The rest of the workday, he tried to sneak in small touches wherever he could, just to be sure that he would actually survive the night.

“Hey, uhm, how about that movie night tonight?” Ryan asked Shane right before they were about to leave work. Shane turned towards him in surprise.

“Well, I, sure!” he smiled, although looking a bit confused. Relieved, Ryan smiled back at him. He really had no idea how he was going to survive this. “Where and when?”

“Your place at 7?” Ryan suggested, Shane agreeing almost immediately. They then left, Ryan wanting to go kick or punch something. He hadn’t planned on actually wanting to spend time with Shane, and it annoyed him. It really did. The worst part of this whole thing, though? He didn’t really want to touch his girlfriend.

Hugging and kissing Helen wasn’t the same anymore. It didn’t feel as good, but he couldn’t let that show. He still loved her, didn’t he? After dinner, his girlfriend looked over at him as they were lying on the couch, talking. She sighed and traced a finger down his chest. 

“Ryan, I think we should get you tested for DSMD. Because I want to know if you have a soulmate.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DSMD = Desolated Soul Mutation Disorder. These people do not have a soulmate, and will never be able to bond with anyone.
> 
> If you want to know more about how the soulmate thing works, I've made a guide that you can find here:  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dQej1QbP_qQR9qcnlEtiaxC8qAnCY9JNEm4d_QHqV2Y/edit?usp=sharing
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! <3


	4. Chapter 4

“DSMD? Helen, those tests cost, what, at least 2,000 dollars?” Ryan sighed, trying really hard not to let it show how much he was panicking. “We can’t afford that.”

“I know, but I’ve talked to both of our parents, and they agreed to pitch in,” she said, looking at him. Ryan wanted to scream that he didn’t need a test, that he already knew that he had a soulmate.

“Maybe. And if I am, I’m taking the cheapest one, we don’t have the money,” he sighed and looked over at her. “I’m sorry babe, you know I don’t really like thinking about the whole soulmate thing. Why would I, when I have such an amazing girlfriend?”

“But don’t you want to know?” Helen bit her bottom lip, looking up at him. Ryan shook his head.

“Not really,” he said. “I’m happy with you, I don’t need to know whether I have a soulmate or not.”

“Can you please do it, though? For me?” she asked, and he knew that he would have to agree as to not seem suspicious. 

“Fine, for you,” he kissed her softly, trying not to make a face at how much his body seemed to hate it. Deciding that he needed to talk to someone about this, he got up from the couch. “I have to call Zack about this video we’re making at work, and then I’ll go to Shane, okay babe?”

“It’s fine, I guess,” Helen sighed. “I’ll miss you.”

He walked out of their apartment and quickly dialed Zack’s number. The blond answered pretty much immediately.

“Hey, man,” he said. “I figured you’d call.”

“Want to meet up? I have a huge problem,” Ryan told him, happy that Zack agreed and then he was on his way to the Chipotle they decided to meet up at. Zack showed up only a couple of minutes after Ryan, and Ryan was almost a bit anxious. It wasn’t as if he had ever thought he and Zack would ever talk about soulmates together.

“What’s up, man?” Zack asked as he sat down, handing Ryan a taco and a milkshake, and Ryan sighed at him.

“Does your girlfriend know that you have a soulmate?” he asked Zack, who shook his head. Ryan closed his eyes, letting out a sigh of frustration. “My girl wants to get me tested for DSMD, and I don’t know what the fuck to do.”

“Wow, okay, uh, I haven’t been in that situation,” Zack looked at him. “Those cheapest tests aren’t that accurate, right? And your test results might be inconclusive, yeah? Use that to your advantage somehow. That’s kind of the only way you’ll get through this, use everything you can to your advantage.”

“Like what?”

“Like in this situation. 4 out of 10 get an inconclusive result on their test,” Zack shrugged. “Go to a soul-bond specialist, with your girlfriend and tell them you want a test for DSMD. They’ll want to speak to you alone, and then they’ll do some quick check-ups, it won’t take long for them to figure out you’re bonded. Reveal the entire situation, and ask them about your options. If you get a shady doctor, good for you.”

“Shady doctor? Wait, you said you haven’t done this, how do you know all this shit?” Ryan frowned at him.

“Oh, I got tested for DSMD right after I met Morgan, as she has DSMD, but she was born with her colors. She doesn’t know I’ve been tested, but I used the same doctor after I bonded to help me find out how the bond was developing, and that shady bitch helped me get out of a lot of sticky situations,” the blond man grinned, and Ryan couldn’t help but chuckle a little. “Oh, why don’t I just give you his number?”

“Uh, sure,” Ryan was admittedly quite confused about everything, but he figured that Zack’s shady doctor would be as good as any. “This is illegal, though.”

“So is not telling your soulmate that you’re bonded, but you know,” Zack shrugged, winking at him. Ryan grinned, finding the whole situation quite unbelievable, really. If someone had told him that he would ever end up hiding an unreciprocated bond – with a man, nonetheless – he would have laughed in their face.

“Do you have, like, romantic feelings for Justin?” Ryan eventually asked. “Or, just, I don’t know, strengthened platonic feelings?”

“You know, I would love to say that they’re just strengthened platonic feelings, but I don’t think you can get away with having platonic feelings for your soulmate.”

“So, what do you identify as, sexually?” Ryan asked him, because he figured that they were in pretty similar situations.

“Straight. Justin is the only man I’ve ever had romantic feelings for, and they’re not really me, you know? I don’t want to fuck him, but I want to spend time with him and touch him, and yes, I really want to fucking kiss him,” Zack chuckled dryly. “Will never happen, though.”

“Have you, uh,” he blushed, unsure of how to ask the next question. It was something Ryan was kind of worried about, and he had to know. “Had sexual thoughts about him?”

Zack sighed and nodded. “Of course. You’re going to want Shane, more than you’ve ever wanted your girlfriend. It goes over eventually, though, but uh,” the blond blushed. “My advice? Don’t have sex with your girlfriend while you’re at your worst. You’ll slip up.”

“You slipped up?” Ryan’s jaw dropped, and he was suddenly imagining all things that could go wrong if that ever happened.

“Almost, yeah,” Zack nodded and scratched the back of his head. “In the middle of the act, I was unable to think of anything but him, and I know I almost moaned his name a couple of times. As well as the fact that whenever I opened my eyes I got disappointed that he wasn’t the one under me.”

Ryan grimaced. Fuck, he hoped that wouldn’t happen to him. Ever. He loved Helen, and she was beautiful and sexy, he would never be disappointed by seeing her instead of, you know, Shane. 

“This sounds terrifying,” he admitted, making the other man laugh. 

“I know, man. I know. I told my friend, who was the one to help me get through this, the same thing,” Zack shrugged. “I wasn’t lying to you, though. It does get a lot easier once the bond is fully developed. It’s just these two months where everything can go to shit.”

“Just one more thing,” Ryan looked at him. “How the fuck am I supposed to touch him? Like, we have a movie night in an hour, and what am I supposed to do? Like, cuddle? Because that will surely be suspicious.”

“You’re lucky enough that Shane doesn’t really seem to mind touching, just make sure that you’re both a bit drunk,” the other man said after a bit of thought. “Justin hates it when people touch him, getting him drunk was the only way I could get him to touch me, or be able to touch him without him freaking out.”

“Well, it doesn’t help much when I hate touching people, and most people know that. In fact, I’m pretty sure he’s been told so.”

“Then pretend you’re a touchy drunk. If you want to stay alive, I think you’ll just have to suck it up dude,” Zack said. “I mean, you can always say ‘no homo’, and lie to the both of you?” 

“I’m not gay.”

“I know, dude. I’m kidding. I once said that, and Justin has never been more careful about not touching me than the following day. Luckily, I only needed to get him drunk again to touch him.”

“I guess,” Ryan sighed, feeling like slamming his forehead against the table. “By the way, could you give me a ride to Shane’s? I walked here, and I noticed you have a car.”

“Yeah, sure, man,” Zach took a sip of his milkshake. “Let’s just finish these, and then we can leave?”

They both ate their tacos and drank their milkshakes relatively quickly. Ryan was pretty excited to have a night completely alone with Shane, although he was pretty nervous as well. He had noticed that his brain and his bond seemed to want two different things, and the bond also seemed to affect his words and actions more than he wanted them to.

“If you hadn’t had a girlfriend, would you have told him?” Zack asked Ryan, and Ryan hesitated. Would he? Because he had to admit that Helen was definitely the main reason why he hadn’t told Shane and just acted on his soulbond. However, he didn’t want to think about everything that could have gone wrong if he told Shane.

“No, I don’t think so, would you?”

“Oh, definitely. I probably would have told him if I could go back to the time when I first found out, too,” Zack admitted. “I love Morgan, she’s great, and I can see myself spending the rest of my life with her, but she’s not my soulmate.”

“I don’t think I could ever do that to Helen,” Ryan sighed. “She means too much to me, and Shane is just a stupid coworker that I don’t even like too much. He’s annoying, way too tall, and he’s so weird. We would never work in a relationship. Me and Helen? We work perfectly.”

“Tell yourself that, and I’ll talk to you in about three months to see if you still feel the same, okay?” Zack chuckled and shook his head. “You’ve only been bonded for what? A week? You have no idea, man.”

“Oh, yeah, how long have you been bonded?” Ryan shot back, not taking Zack’s comment too lightly. He knew himself, therefore he would know whether he and Shane would ever work out.

“Since my first day at BuzzFeed, so 10 months or so?” Zack told him. “I used to say the same thing, and honestly, your soulmate is a soulmate for a reason. You fit together, and they’re the only person you’ll ever be able to have such a connection with. I would do anything to go back to that day and just tell Justin exactly what happened when he shook my hand.”

“Oh, well, luckily I’m not you,” Ryan said, unsure of why he was being so mean to Zack when he only wanted to help. Fortunately, Zack didn’t take any of it personally.

“We’re here, call me if you need any more help, yeah? Have fun,” Zack smiled at him, and Ryan got out of the car with a small ‘thank you’, completely aware of how much of an asshole he was being. Could he blame it on having not touched Shane in what felt like way too long? He was pretty sure he could.

He barely had time to get to the door and knock before Shane had opened it and was standing in front of him. Ryan blushed a bit of what that could mean. Was Shane waiting for him in his hallway, just as impatient as Ryan himself? Probably not. It was probably a coincidence.

“You’re early,” Shane commented, and Ryan checked the time. Surprisingly enough, he was indeed nearly ten minutes early.

“Don’t get used to it, Zack drove me,” Ryan told him, stepping inside and taking off his jacket.

“Zack?” Shane frowned, closing the door behind them. Ryan nodded, trying very hard to resist the pull in his bond, making him want to hug the taller man tightly and just not let him go for a while.

“Yeah, you know, the guy that was in charge of the video we made today?” Ryan put his hands in his pockets, taking a deep breath. He needed to touch Shane somehow, preferably pretty soon, before his bond killed him. As if reading his thoughts, Shane put an arm on his shoulder as he lead him into the living room.

“So, uh, I made popcorn and I got some beer, I hope that’s okay?” Shane asked him, looking almost as nervous as Ryan felt. He wondered if Shane felt any different about Ryan, even if he hadn’t bonded.

“Yeah, that’s great,” Ryan smiled at him, looking around awkwardly as Shane removed the hand on his shoulder. He almost wanted to ask him if he could put it back, but managed to shut himself up. “What movie were you thinking?”

“I don’t really know, what do you want to watch?” Shane asked, and Ryan came up with an idea. Everyone knew that Ryan was jumpy and easily scared, and that he believed in ghosts. Touching people when you were scared was acceptable, right?

“Uh, maybe horror? It’s my favorite genre,” he grinned, and Shane raised his brows in surprise. However, he did agree, and Ryan grinned in triumph. Thank god, that would make the whole touching bit slightly easier.

“Aren’t you afraid of ghosts?” Shane asked him, and Ryan shrugged nonchalantly. 

“A bit, yeah,” he admitted. “I still like horror, though. I like being scared.”

Shane shook his head with a small chuckle. “Okay, if you say so. Well, I’ll be there to protect you from your imagination if things get too bad.”

Something about that comment made Ryan feel very warm, and his bond seemed to be pretty satisfied with it too, as he felt himself getting pulled closer towards him. Shane told him he would protect him, that must mean something, right? They both sat down on the couch, a bit too far apart for Ryan’s liking, as they weren’t at all touching.

“Okay, Insidious, The Conjuring, Sinister or Paranormal Activity?” Shane asked him, browsing through Netflix.

“I haven’t watched any of them,” Ryan shrugged. “They have two Insidious movies, so I say Insidious.”

“Oh, you’re planning on staying for that long, huh?” Shane looked at him, and Ryan’s eyes widened in realization. He hadn’t really planned how to get back home. “I’m just kidding. We don’t have work tomorrow, you can stay the night if you want.”

“Yeah, I think I have to, actually,” Ryan chuckled. “Well, I don’t have to, I would probably manage to find a way to get home, but you know, it would make it easier.”

“Sure, I don’t mind,” Shane smiled, before selecting said movie and pressing play. The creepy music at the very start of the movie was enough to creep Ryan out, so he opened a beer and downed it pretty quick. Shane stared at him curiously, but did the same. Ryan hesitantly moved a bit closer so that their shoulders were touching, letting out a small sigh of relief. Who knew that a simple touch could ever feel so good.

Ryan squirmed a bit, trying to make it so that more of their arms were touching, although it probably looked more like he was scared and uncomfortable.

“You okay?” Shane muttered, probably noticing how weird Ryan was acting. Ryan nodded, pressing his lips together in a tight line.

“Okay,” Shane smiled at him. “I’m here if you need a shoulder to cry on, or hide behind, or anything.”

“Don’t worry man, I can handle it,” Ryan tried to seem unaffected as he was opening another beer, even though he knew he was blushing. Shane reached for the bowl of popcorn, putting it in-between them. They both reached for the popcorn at the same time, and when their hands met, Ryan had to force himself to not take Shane’s hand. Oh, God, if he was struggling this much on the 10th day, how would he be able to survive later on? If he remembered correctly, the most intense feelings would occur during the third and fourth weeks of bonding, and Ryan was not looking forward to it.

Honestly, Ryan did pretty good, and managed to stay put for the first two jump scares. During the third jump scare of the movie, however, he grabbed Shane’s upper arm and curled up against him. He noticed that Shane didn’t comment on it, just subtly slung an arm around him and left it to rest loosely on Ryan’s hip.

This felt too domestic and romantic, if Ryan was completely honest, but his bond was too happy for him to care. He needed this, if he wanted his bond to develop as soon as possible.

“Just saying, you’re not handling it really well, dude,” Shane commented after several jump scares where Ryan was convinced he was going to die of a heart attack, and got closer and closer to Shane each time. 

“Shut up, I’m doing my best,” Ryan rolled his eyes, making himself comfortable. They were both pretty tipsy, so he just pretended that he was a bit more drunk than he actually was.

Shane chuckled and Ryan could feel Shane’s head dip down to rest on top of his, and he didn’t know why he wanted to tilt his head up just enough for them to kiss, but he really wanted to. He couldn’t, though. He couldn’t actually cheat on Helen. This was bad enough.

Helen. Fuck. He had to tell her that he wasn’t coming home tonight, and she was not going to like it. Struggling to get his phone out of his pants due to the position he was finding himself in, he moved away from Shane. The older man seemed a bit upset at the lack of the touch, and he wasn’t the only one. Only ten seconds without touching Shane made Ryan go completely mad, and he wanted nothing more than for them to touch again.

Both of them were probably very aware of how romantic and non-platonic this should be, but Ryan forced himself into believing that this didn’t mean anything. Hopefully, Shane didn’t read too much into it either. 

He sent a quick text to Helen before crawling right back to Shane, not really caring about how this was affecting his emotions. Ryan wasn’t stupid, of course he knew that he was falling in love with Shane, but he couldn’t act on it. He couldn’t.

They watched both Insidious movies, and by the time they were done with the second one, Ryan was sitting up against the arm of the couch, with his legs draped over Shane’s lap, and an arm wrapped around him. He didn’t exactly know how or when it happened, and he suspected that it was the bond that had made his body move. All he knew was that it was really comfortable, and he didn’t really want to move.

“You know, I wouldn’t have pegged you for a cuddler, everyone at the office has warned me about even touching you,” Shane chuckled, and Ryan blushed a bit before making some silly excuse about how he only cuddled during horror movies, and only if he’d been drinking. To be honest, Shane probably realized that it was a lie, but Ryan didn’t even care. 

After the movies were done, Ryan checked his phone. As suspected, there was a passive aggressive text from his girlfriend, but he rolled his eyes before putting it back into his pockets. They quickly tidied the living room before going into bed.

“Uh, I didn’t bring anything to sleep in,” Ryan told Shane, and the latter smiled faintly before handing him a shirt.

“Do you need pants too, or is that okay?” Shane asked, yawning. Ryan shook his head, looking over at him. Were they going to sleep in the same bed? Was Shane wearing a shirt while sleeping, or would he be sleeping with a bare chest? Shane spoke up again, snapping him out of his thoughts. “Great. Uh, so, I don’t have an extra bed, you can take the couch, or we can share. It’s a king size, I think we’d be fine, but I’d understand if you don’t want to.”

“We can share,” Ryan spoke before his mind had really caught up to the words, and he wanted to hit himself. No, he did in fact not want to share with Shane. He had enough problems keeping his hands off him as it was, thanks.

“Oh, okay, cool,” Shane seemed surprised at his response, but not nearly as surprised as Ryan himself. What the fuck had he gotten himself into? After a bit of a pause, Shane spoke again. “Uh, I usually sleep in my underwear, but I can put on a shirt.”

“It’s your bed, dude, do whatever you want,” Ryan shrugged, again not really thinking before speaking. Shane shrugged and hesitated before taking off his glasses and getting into bed. Ryan followed suit, lying down next to him.

“Aren’t you going to remove your contacts?” Shane frowned, and Ryan wanted to curse himself. Fuck. Of course. The whole color thing. He got out of bed again, sighing slightly.

“I’ll do it in the bathroom,” Ryan said awkwardly, before making his way to the bathroom. Of course, he didn’t actually have any lenses to remove, and he couldn’t say that he threw them out either, because those ‘lenses’ were expensive as fuck. He really hadn’t thought this through, had he?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Please leave a comment!


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